Christianly Speaking: What To Do When You Feel God Has Forgotten About You

When I transitioned from Florida to Georgia, I felt like everything was finally coming together. I thought that I was going to score the perfect job, get married to the perfect guy I was with, and get everything that life tells you you're supposed to have when you work hard. Imagine my surprise then, when none of that happened. I was without a job for longer than I could have even fathomed, my relationship abruptly ended, and — most memorably — I was extremely depressed and felt as if God had truly forgotten about me.

One of the most common things I hear from Christians during their walk through the wilderness is that God has forgotten about them. It's a misconception that almost everyone that knows God has experienced, is experiencing, or will experience at some point. Though it may not feel like it when you're going through it, it's almost as if this feeling is necessary for your growth with God.

To be honest, even after my time in the wilderness had technically ended, I still struggled with feeling like God had forgotten about me. This time though, it was because I had no idea of where I should be going next. The important thing to remember when you feel like this is that it won't last forever if you don't allow it to. Those feelings of being forgotten are all just a distraction from you getting to the next level that God has for you. It does, however, require you to be willing to seek something new and continuously remind yourself that you are unforgettable in the eyes of God. There's never going to be a time where He goes back on His promise or leaves you out of His will. Never.

So, if you're currently in a season of feeling forgotten, here are a few things that I've learned will help keep you at peace when chaos hits.

1. Keep a Journal: One of the most important things I've done while on my journey in Christianity is keep a journal. Though I initially felt a little uneasy about doing so (mostly because I pictured myself being like Doug Funny), I quickly got comfortable doing it. Keeping a journal became a way for me to have intimate talks with God without feeling like I had to put so much thought into my prayers. It helped me to get out what I didn't want to verbally express to others and gave me a way to vent without being embarrassed. Quite possibly the most important thing for me, keeping a journal helped serve as a way to keep track of how far I've come in my journey. There are times where I go back to read something I wrote three years ago and say "Wow, I was so broken back then." My journal keeps me reminded that if God didn't forget about me in my lowest moment, He won't forget about me now.

2. Reflect on the last thing He told you: Feeling lost in your journey is a common thing. It's not specific to one person or specific to one situation that you're going through. It happens more often than some of us would like to admit and at times when we feel like we need to be led the most. What I've learned through time though is that when I've felt lost or forgotten about, the only thing I could rely on was the last promise or instruction God had given me. Quite often I didn't understand why, but as time has gone on, it's made perfect sense. Sometimes God isn't done teaching you in that season, so you have to keep going through it. Other times, it could simply be because you weren't listening the first time He told you something so you can't move on to the next thing. Whatever the reason, reflecting on that last thing you remembered hearing from Him can be a way to give yourself a heart check and catapult you into your next season.

3. Get intimate with Him: I can honestly admit to straying away from God when I feel like He's forgotten about me. What I've learned, however, is that I should be doing the exact opposite. When you're feeling distant from God or that He isn't listening to your prayers, you should be going harder than you were before. It's easy to get distracted and think "why should I keep doing this when He's not listening?" The Bible reminds us that we are to pray continually and give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18) and that whatever we ask will be given according to His will (John 15:7). Abiding in Him and His love at all times will help you to remember that His delays are never to hurt you; they are meant to prosper and grow you.

4. Remember that no answer doesn't mean the answer is no: I don't know how many times I've cried out to God only to hear absolutely nothing in return. I've felt abandoned, frustrated, and disappointed when I've come out of prayer before and I'm sure you have too. Unfortunately, most Christians are interested in the microwave answer. We want what we want exactly when we want it, and God doesn't work like that. Going into prayer once, twice, or even 50 times doesn't mean that God will expedite the blessing or give you the answer you're looking for on your timing. I can distinctly remember praying for something specific four years ago and not even seeing a portion of that prayer come to fruition until this year. God's timing is the best timing and He will give you the answer that He needs you to have when His time is right. Hearing nothing when you want an answer doesn't mean the answer is always no. It could simply mean just not right now.

5. Get your obedience in check: One thing that my Pastor always says is "partial obedience is still disobedience," and boy was he telling the truth. Though shortcuts in life are often encouraged and applauded, when it comes to God, they are really non-existent. I, for one, can truthfully say that staying obedient is something that I struggle with. Even with the simplest of tasks, I get lazy and say "well, I'll do it tomorrow." In reality though, when God gives you instruction to do something, you have to do it in His timing — not yours. Staying obedient makes it easier for you to hear God when He's talking and helps ease your spirit when you feel like He's forgotten about what He's instructed you to do.

6. Go on a fast: Whether it's for one week, five days, or 21 days, going on a fast can provide the clarity that you need in your current walk. How you choose to fast is totally up to you and God (removal of social media, television, meat, sweets, etc.), but I can almost 100 percent guarantee that if you're dedicated to your sacrifice, you'll get closer to God and receive the answer you're looking for.

7. Get intentional: Becoming intentional about your walk with God and even the ability to hear Him more sounds simple, but it really isn't. The good thing about it is that you're never alone in that feeling. Just like with anything, becoming intentional is a decision that you make for yourself. For me, I just got tired of trying to do things my way. I was a "good" Christian to others, but I didn't feel like a fulfilled Christian to myself — and I don't know if I ever will. I yearned for more of God and more interaction with people who loved Him like I did. It's easy to say what you want, but the real test comes when you have the choice to be intentional about it. Being intentional doesn't just mean making it to church on time (or more), either. It's a start, but you have to be intentional about all things in your life because Christ has strengthened you to accomplish them all. That means being intentional about how you handle money, your time, your love, your obedience, and everything else, too. Becoming intentional may take a little time, but once you get there, you'll be introduced to a new leg of your journey that you will appreciate so much more.

While there are plenty of ways that you can ease the feeling of being forgotten, these are just a few that have worked for me. A key thing to remember is that God will give guidance to those who choose to follow Him. He'll never leave you wondering or guessing because He's not the author of confusion. The instruction will be there; it's just up to us to seek it.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. — Jeremiah 29:11-13

With Creative (and Unforgettable Thoughts),

-Kp